DQFC October 2019 - voting

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Category
The Runway
Posts
31
Created
21.09.2019
Author
Iulja
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railophone
railophone
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Freethinkerland
railophone
02.10.2019 15:41:51
railophone
I said I really didn’t want to discuss this anymore because every time I think about having to defend my feelings I just get anxious that I won’t be understood. Yet it just keeps continuing... I’m tired, guys. I don’t care anymore. If you really want to use the term that badly because it is not derogatory in your culture, I literally cannot stop you. 

I just ask you think about the history behind a culture before you use it as a costume theme. Be respectful when you use a cultural item and please try your best to not replicate racist caricatures. 

Just let this end, and let’s move on. Please. 

02.10.2019 15:41:51
You can't keep doing shitty things and then feel bad about yourself like that makes it okay. You need to be better. -S3E10 Bojack Horseman
Senator
Vita Brevis
Vita Brevis
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Antitheocra
Vita Brevis
02.10.2019 15:57:54
Vita Brevis
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings, Railophone. That takes courage. I agree with your point of view and appreciate your willingness to put yourself out there to educate others in a vulnerable way. Props to you! <3

02.10.2019 15:57:54





Fashion Designer
TokiKonoe
TokiKonoe
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Freethinkerland
TokiKonoe
02.10.2019 15:59:41
TokiKonoe
I suppose everyone here just wanted to let you know that we don't use that word in offensive meaning. I think the intention was more like to cheer you up a bit :/.  It's not like we or whoever want to use that term "that badly" but Iulja already said in another thread that unfortunately it can't be changed :(. I guess there will be some discussion about this later anyways, but let people talk, other cultures face this kind of situations too and it's always good to have talk about it.





02.10.2019 15:59:41
 
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Cum_Dumpster
Cum_Dumpster
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Cum_Dumpster
02.10.2019 16:36:37
Cum_Dumpster
In regards to what Iulja said about Holland, as a child I was taught that it was simply what the country was called, though considering that was quite a long time ago now, it does not surprise me that things have changed.
Rail, I adore you, and I am very sorry that this topic has created so much anxiety and bad feelings in you. Perhaps at a later time, you could look back on this and see that there is a silver lining, many of us commenting here are learning things that we did not know before and are becoming educated about a term that appears to be more and more antiquated, particularly in the US. I'm grateful for your posts bringing this to light, because I would not have known otherwise.
It reminds me very much of the appropriation of Native American traditional dress, particularly around Halloween. My ancestors are Cherokee, and we have always been proud of that, so to see people stomping around in war bonnets and and other sacred regalia is quite offensive to many of us, as well, especially because if they had the proper knowledge surrounding the traditions, I don't believe they would do such a thing(at least, I truly hope not).

02.10.2019 16:36:37
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Namastis
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Namastis
02.10.2019 16:42:56
Namastis
Rail, I also don't want to throw in another two cents. I hope outfits will be beautiful, not close to be caricatures. Me, personally, I'm kinda proud of mine. She's really a model of beauty for me. No hard feelings? 

02.10.2019 16:42:56
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torrenoia
torrenoia
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torrenoia
02.10.2019 17:48:44
torrenoia
i know it seems hard to avoid offending someone, but i feel like this just goes to show that certain words or phrases or other things that you may think are perfectly fine to say, might have offensive connotations to someone else and if they speak up about it, like railophone did, its best to be respectful. i know everyone was just trying to assure her that the word might mean something good in your country or something but thats kinda just pushing her discomfort and the negative connotations of the word aside. it kinda reminds me of when straight people say "queer" to me or something. you may not see it as an offensive word but if someone is offended by it you should avoid trying to say "nonono i mean it in a good way!" because like i said you arent the one affected by that word unlike other people are

railophone im sorry this is stressing you out so much :( i know its been said that it cant be changed but itd be great if we could have the option to do that in the future, because stuff like this slips by and the people running this didnt know about the word initially(not really your fault, not everyone knows the context of every word its understandable but still) until it was brought up after the theme was announced

im done rambling now idk if that made sense but im not like trying to be passive aggressive or start something and im not trying to be the bi gbad sjw or whatever you wanna call me lol, i just think everyone should take into consideration how people are affected by things

02.10.2019 17:48:44
they/them | (in a thick new yorker accent) ey im meowin ova here!!
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railophone
railophone
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Freethinkerland
railophone
02.10.2019 19:06:15
railophone
I have to reiterate that I have never harbored any sort of ill will toward those who do not align with my point of view, nor do I think negatively of anyone who made or voted for this theme.

I do, however, as torrenoia pointed out, feel as if I was forced to push my feelings aside because you all were trying to cheer me up and explain how you weren't using it in a derogatory manner. It's really not that simple. You can have the best of intentions, but when someone says they're upset, you should be listening, not speaking over them. The reason why I haven't been resoundingly positive about the discussion is precisely because I feel like my experiences (as an Asian woman in a predominantly white country) have been written over by people who haven't experienced the same thing.

I'm truly not trying to blow this out of proportion. I kind of wanted this to end yesterday, after I thanked you all for your time and opinions. Unfortunately, it continued to where we are now.

So will there be a conclusion to this any time soon? It has been expressed that we all come from clearly different cultural backgrounds. I think we all have said everything we could say about the usage of the term and the theme this month. Anything else at this point would likely be sort of repetitive - am I wrong?

02.10.2019 19:06:15
You can't keep doing shitty things and then feel bad about yourself like that makes it okay. You need to be better. -S3E10 Bojack Horseman
State Minister
Sandi Lut
Sandi Lut
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Antitheocra
Sandi Lut
02.10.2019 19:28:58
Sandi Lut
I have to apologize for my comment, now that you put it that way I realize I was insensitive even though I was trying to cheer you up. You are right railophone! But it is hard nowadays to keep up with what is insensitive or even racist to someone. I was brought up in a different time and it's hard sometimes to understand where people are coming from.
Regardless, I have been insensitive and I humbly apologize.

Now that I am PB and in charge of the DQFC theme, I will try my best to keep these derogatory themes out of DQFC.

02.10.2019 19:28:58
Happiness is inside yourself

Citizen
Namastis
Namastis
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Secville
Namastis
02.10.2019 20:25:54
Namastis
Well. Sorry once again for a derogatory idea, even if right now I don't know if my apologies have any value. Railophone, I don't know if my question about no hard feelings is going to be left without answer, but I just hope you understand what I tried to say as well, as I understand you. That's all. 

02.10.2019 20:25:54
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Citizen
railophone
railophone
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Freethinkerland
railophone
02.10.2019 22:25:55
railophone
Hey, I guess there was some miscommunication on my part. I didn't address you directly by name, but did say in my last post I don't feel negatively toward you or anyone else. 

02.10.2019 22:25:55
You can't keep doing shitty things and then feel bad about yourself like that makes it okay. You need to be better. -S3E10 Bojack Horseman

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