@yazabelle
You deserve to be loved and respected no matter what you label yourself, if you feel it fits your identity best :)
I think something really important to talk about is the different perspectives and biases people have on F vs. M trans people.
People get upset about nonbinary people identifying as anything whether they're female or male. They get threatened by either one and have their own biases based on sex.
(It feels weird saying 'male" "female" so much but I guess that's also why it's important to be able to talk about comfortably as a trans person? I'm really just thinking as I'm typing. Sort of like how people are uncomfortable with the word "lesbian", but we should be able to communicate who we are without feeling like it invalidates our GENDER. Our different perspectives are still very real and we deserve to discuss our pride, our struggles, and what needs work within the community.)
What determines how easily we come to accept / get to learn our identity specifically as queer people, is environment / misogyny / trans-misogyny / lack of respect for gay and queer men and women / hate for masculine people who are AFAB / hate and neglect for AMAB who present feminine or masculine and are invalidated either way even when questioning.
There's so much to say, but I just wanna bring up that our community does need work and we have issues that we contribute to. Everyone deserves inner love, peace, and outer love, peace. You deserve to take time to figure out what label you go by without worrying what others will think, which is definitely something we will all have to navigate throughout life unfortunately. No we are not disgusting, and yes, we will always be tied to words like "strange" to make us feel alienated, because we are alone without each other and inner love and PRIDE>
Last thing I wanna bring up, physical appearance and beauty also have a lot to do with comfort. If you don't fit regular beauty standards, especially as a queer or trans person, then automatically people will respect you less than someone they find pretty.
Then on the other side of that, people who are considered "pretty" or "not" (in the eyes of people because we glorify physical beauty), get sexualized no matter what. People who get mad knowing they can't be with someone they find attractive, (specifically referring to men with lesbians but y'know it can be anyone). Those same people shame anyone who they don't find appealing because they're insecure about how they can't fit their own standards, so they focus on others. And yes, AMAB trans people can have biases too, as can AFAB trans people. For example: I have had many negative experiences with men as a female so it's hard for me to form meaningful connections with them. Yes this is valid, but I am now learning that it is a form of judgement on someone's character before knowing someone or when they aren't even doing anything wrong. Anyways, on the flip side, males have been expected to sexualize females like it's part of their identity throughout history, so AMAB, whether or not they are attracted to AFAB, feel entitled to comment on our appearance / get jealous about our "privilege" because we are so sexualized lol. THIS IS NOT ME TRYING TO GENERALIZE ANYONE, I AM JUST TALKIN ABOUT ISSUES / GREY AREAS WE FACE INSIDE AND OUTSIDE OF THE COMMUNITY WHEN IT COMES TO COMFORT IN OUR IDENTITY AS NONBINARY - TRANS PEOPLE
I LOVE YOU ALL AND WE DESERVE BETTER AND I'M BRINGING THESE THINGS UP SO WE CAN HAVE OPEN MINDED DISCUSSIONS / MY PERSPECTIVE FOR ANYONE WHO HAS QUESTIONS AND SOMETHING TO SHARE
You deserve to be loved and respected no matter what you label yourself, if you feel it fits your identity best :)
I think something really important to talk about is the different perspectives and biases people have on F vs. M trans people.
People get upset about nonbinary people identifying as anything whether they're female or male. They get threatened by either one and have their own biases based on sex.
(It feels weird saying 'male" "female" so much but I guess that's also why it's important to be able to talk about comfortably as a trans person? I'm really just thinking as I'm typing. Sort of like how people are uncomfortable with the word "lesbian", but we should be able to communicate who we are without feeling like it invalidates our GENDER. Our different perspectives are still very real and we deserve to discuss our pride, our struggles, and what needs work within the community.)
What determines how easily we come to accept / get to learn our identity specifically as queer people, is environment / misogyny / trans-misogyny / lack of respect for gay and queer men and women / hate for masculine people who are AFAB / hate and neglect for AMAB who present feminine or masculine and are invalidated either way even when questioning.
There's so much to say, but I just wanna bring up that our community does need work and we have issues that we contribute to. Everyone deserves inner love, peace, and outer love, peace. You deserve to take time to figure out what label you go by without worrying what others will think, which is definitely something we will all have to navigate throughout life unfortunately. No we are not disgusting, and yes, we will always be tied to words like "strange" to make us feel alienated, because we are alone without each other and inner love and PRIDE>
Last thing I wanna bring up, physical appearance and beauty also have a lot to do with comfort. If you don't fit regular beauty standards, especially as a queer or trans person, then automatically people will respect you less than someone they find pretty.
Then on the other side of that, people who are considered "pretty" or "not" (in the eyes of people because we glorify physical beauty), get sexualized no matter what. People who get mad knowing they can't be with someone they find attractive, (specifically referring to men with lesbians but y'know it can be anyone). Those same people shame anyone who they don't find appealing because they're insecure about how they can't fit their own standards, so they focus on others. And yes, AMAB trans people can have biases too, as can AFAB trans people. For example: I have had many negative experiences with men as a female so it's hard for me to form meaningful connections with them. Yes this is valid, but I am now learning that it is a form of judgement on someone's character before knowing someone or when they aren't even doing anything wrong. Anyways, on the flip side, males have been expected to sexualize females like it's part of their identity throughout history, so AMAB, whether or not they are attracted to AFAB, feel entitled to comment on our appearance / get jealous about our "privilege" because we are so sexualized lol. THIS IS NOT ME TRYING TO GENERALIZE ANYONE, I AM JUST TALKIN ABOUT ISSUES / GREY AREAS WE FACE INSIDE AND OUTSIDE OF THE COMMUNITY WHEN IT COMES TO COMFORT IN OUR IDENTITY AS NONBINARY - TRANS PEOPLE
I LOVE YOU ALL AND WE DESERVE BETTER AND I'M BRINGING THESE THINGS UP SO WE CAN HAVE OPEN MINDED DISCUSSIONS / MY PERSPECTIVE FOR ANYONE WHO HAS QUESTIONS AND SOMETHING TO SHARE
