Looks that Hurt

Category
Haute Coffee Shop

Posts
61

Created
16.03.2021

Author
stagtime

Citizen

stagtime

Level 34
Sex Appeal 28815
Reputation 14896
Posts 192

16.03.2021 19:16:06
stagtime

Hey folks! Going off recent events I'd like to see how people feel about the BL policies and execution of these policies with fashion and looks these days. Are there things that bother you personally or raise concerns for the sake of others? If so, try not to call the person out no matter how much you'd like to or how much you think you're helping. This is a silly dress up game, but it's also a place where ideas and fashions are spread and it's important to be mindful about what we share with one another.

Anyhow, try not to witch hunt. This is meant to be a safe spot to talk about any looks that bug you but please be vague and do not call people out by name or username. This is a discussion thread, not a bully thread. It is meant to spread awareness for what should not be accepted on this site by players.

16.03.2021 19:16:06

Legal Alien

AlienPrince HOTFIX 1_05

Level 21
Sex Appeal 6646
Reputation 5296
Posts 103

16.03.2021 19:27:02
AlienPrince HOTFIX 1_05

Regarding the suggestion of a homeles runway theme for a PBFC, I found the suggestion very insensitive and hurtful, because homelesness is a very real thing for a lot of lgbt kids, who will often be forced into dangerous situations because of this, and I think it would be vile to allow people the platform to make fun edgy costumes out of such a horrible and real thing. It would feel just as disrespectful as it would feel to see homelesness as a theme in an actual real life runway show, something exclusively enjoyed by the rich and privileged and most diffenetly not anyone currently homeles...

16.03.2021 19:27:02

they/them|| The eyes are the nipples of the face ||

Citizen

Cum_Dumpster

Level 131
Sex Appeal 1775923
Reputation 155590
Posts 1282

16.03.2021 19:38:28
Cum_Dumpster

I'd like to remind users that we don't have policies regarding outfits on this site.

Because the core element of this game is the dress up feature, policing outfits has never been something any of the admins or mods was interested in, because it creates what is known as a "slippery slope". This changed slightly when a user copied an outfit and won a place in the PBFC competition(they essentially got a large reward for pretending to be the PB, since most users who voted believed it was actually Toki's look).

In any event, whether you accept someone's look or not, and for whatever reason, please be aware that harassing users for their outfits is not tolerated here.

16.03.2021 19:38:28

ChumDumpster's wife irl
Update 2022: Site has been soured for me so I took a break. Still not certain about coming back...

Legal Alien

AlienPrince HOTFIX 1_05

Level 21
Sex Appeal 6646
Reputation 5296
Posts 103

16.03.2021 19:44:04
AlienPrince HOTFIX 1_05

Well, it’s a good thing this thread is not for harassing people but for pointing out what kind of looks have come across as hurtful or insensitive, without naming names or encouraging witch hunts. I believe the intention is to attempt to be educational, maybe even broaden someone’s perspective if we’re feeling particularly spicy.

So pls behave, guys? You know cause if you do you get to express your opinion. I think.

16.03.2021 19:44:04

they/them|| The eyes are the nipples of the face ||

Citizen

Bimkko

Level 41
Sex Appeal 54207
Reputation 18823
Posts 253

16.03.2021 19:55:14
Bimkko

i believe that, even with the dressup aspect, there has to be just a tiny amount of policing present BECAUSE of the absence of any filter option on outfits,
by that I mean,
if there was an option to sort of put a "spoiler" filter on certain specific outfits, to warn that they are potentially triggering, the issue could be bypassed to fit the bimboland mentality of "everyone is free to do as they wish".
I see the slippery slope, and the potential "dictatorship" of outfits you guys probably fear, but I think the safety of players is most important, and given the outfits are publically displayed in the forum user's profile pic, and at the bottom of the page on recently actives, and in duels, and everywhere, if there is no filter that a player can enable to mask triggering outfits, the site disregards the rights and safety of some players in favours of others, instead of finding a way to make them cohabit, and until there is a way to enable both to exist (i only mentioned the filter system, but there's probably more ways, I'm just thinking of it as some other sites use it, I'm thinking for exemple artfight, which allows say, gore and body horror and many other things, but requires a content warning to be put, thus masking the potentially triggering artworks from users who wish to not see them)

Personaly i DO believe in any case, there still is some monitoring on looks to be done, otherwise we'd also fall on the slippery slopes of allowing many distateful and downright unnacceptable things (ie racial caricatures, looks inciting violence against certain groups etc...), and that is also another direction that is just not desirable for the site.

On the recent issues, I do believe the theme aforementioned in the thread was potentially distateful. The "runaway" aesthetic could have had acceptable portrayals, but given the reality of homelessness, and the trauma it implies, it could also easely fall in poor taste territory.
Homelessness is a very traumatic experience, even moreso im thinking homeless women, we don't even need to go into details, just look at stats of assault and violence (physical, mental and sexual) they go through. Romanticising and even sexualising it is not very appropriate in my opinion. I don't think that theme is unsalvageable but i feel people tend to not look at the bigger picture, here, that there may be many players on this game who went through or currently go through homelessness and use this site as an fun little escape, the same way we all do, and who'd be put right back into the hell that is that situation seeing that theme everywhere for a month.

The same thing happened with the bloody valentine's theme, and while homelessness and domestic violence are two very different things, so i'm not going to assume people saw the criticisms raised then and chose to ignore it, but possibly just didnt see the similar issues in the two, both those themes are similar in the way they can carry very harmful portrayals and stereotypes that are very triggering to people, while it could be avoided by moderating the looks to ensure they don't cross the fine line of upsetting.

My point may not be very clear, I didnt get time to proofread and i am speaking a bit out of emotion there, but I believe, in the quite centrist view of bimboland, there is a way to make 'people can make looks as they please' and 'no one gets hurt" coexist, the way the universal declaration of human rights states that everyone is granted the same rights, but those only apply as long as they dont infer on other's. one's right to dress their avatar should not infer on another player's right to play comfortably without going through trauma

16.03.2021 19:55:14

:-(
https://bimbo.land/bimbo/bimkko/111741

Citizen

Broseph

Level 29
Sex Appeal 18548
Reputation 11060
Posts 33

16.03.2021 20:38:56
Broseph

I think this is a very worthwhile avenue of discussion; I hope that others will feel free to put in their own two cents on the matter as well.

I think there should probably be a little bit of enforcement for outfits . . . there are definitely some looks I have seen on this site that come off as racially insensitive at best; such as using items or hairstyles with certain cultural significance for people outside your culture, or choosing to use a significantly darker skin tone for certain looks. I'm a white guy so I'm not personally affected by these looks, but I have certainly noticed some trends that seem concerning in this respect.

I also certainly agree with what AlienPrince was talking about. I have seen the topic they have mentioned, but I have also personally seen some other looks that seem to be depicting common traumatic experiences (I have seen multiple "domestic violence" looks for example.) Some of these traumatic experiences are things that I or my close family members have experienced.

Although I personally wish that others would not sensationalize matters like these for their looks, I agree with Bimkko’s suggestion of a spoiler function could be useful in this regard. His mention of taking ideas from ArtFight could also be worth looking into, I have found that ArtFight is a good example of how to enforce boundaries (especially re: gore and NSFW images, as Bimkko mentioned.)

Much like I was talking about earlier, in this respect, the lack of enforcement creates an uncomfortable environment for me. I would guess others on this site probably also feel the same. I do not condone any harassment of course, but I believe that bringing up how certain looks may impact others should be encouraged. I think the points that the other users in this thread are very valid, and certainly worth discussing.

16.03.2021 20:38:56

Citizen

shortkinghimbo

Level 42
Sex Appeal 57070
Reputation 14219
Posts 123

16.03.2021 20:56:34
shortkinghimbo

i think having a pbfc theme that will so inevitably attract negative portrayals of a marginalized group is the issue. of course every theme can be used to create tasteless, but also uplifting looks like the suggester intended, but i highly doubt that a group that's so stigmatized and looked down upon will have a majority of people representing them in a positive light when prompted to create an image of them. i totally understand the intention of the suggester, as someone who's involved in squatter communities i know plenty of people who are homeless by choice and take pride in being so, and i can appreciate the "aesthetic" of off-the-grid living as much as the next person - but when most people see the word "homeless", eco-friendly anarchist communes are not the first thing that pop into their heads.

16.03.2021 20:56:34

he/him, dni if you're cringe and/or fail

Citizen

kujojotaro

Level 28
Sex Appeal 16620
Reputation 12555
Posts 253

16.03.2021 21:59:11
kujojotaro

I don't keep up with PBFC but if there's suggestions for a "homelessness" theme like I've read in here, that's very... insensitive. That opens things up for making marginalized groups that face legitimate discrimination and danger from their peers/family to being made into an "aesthetic"/"edgy" outfit.
As a trans gay neurodivergent man if I went on here and saw somebody making my identity into an outfit to win a competition I'd probably feel very uncomfortable at the least and have a full-on breakdown at the most. ESPECIALLY if it was someone that isn't any of those things.
But enough about me- using a group that's so stigmatized already as a theme brings a very real possibility of offensive outfits being created, moreso than a theme that's... y'know, not a group of real people.
It's not like PBFC is the only time people make outfits, though. And I've seen a few that have made me somewhat uncomfortable. Usually, it's the NSFW ones.
I agree with what other people have been saying. A spoiler feature being implemented as an option to turn on for outfits could help a lot with keeping people safe and having outfits that could offend/trigger, allowing them to coexist. This could also go for spoilering posts/pictures that may be somewhat offensive/triggering.

16.03.2021 21:59:11

18, autistic, mlm t4t, actual irl vampire, vamp/vampself ONLY
gerard way lives in my brain

Citizen

Aristeia

Level 27
Sex Appeal 14150
Reputation 11293
Posts 171

16.03.2021 23:42:34
Aristeia

i think its a little weird when players who are white & have main looks w/ white ppl have one or two looks w/ black ppl
its also weird when people have looks picturing domestic abuse:/

16.03.2021 23:42:34

yours truly,

Citizen

cr0cpot

Level 28
Sex Appeal 16441
Reputation 11155
Posts 117

17.03.2021 05:02:35
cr0cpot

There's literally no way a homeless theme could be respectful and I would die on that hill. I've had lots of friends who are homeless or are intermittently homeless, and it's not something that should be made into a dress up contest.

I make a lot of fits with gore items and I would love a spoiler function for them. Bimbo gore isn't really graphic but I can imagine some people would just rather not look at them.
Also I get this is a bimbo dress up site but extremely nsfw looks irk me considering it's 16+

17.03.2021 05:02:35

Ximboland news

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ forum rules and policies
Good morning Ximboland, this is Mister Tib, your new Minister of Justice (it's just tibby in a beard, dont worry) these are the new and current forum rules, please read them as they will be enforced starting now. Policies ₊˚⊹ First and...
꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ forum rules and policies
Good morning Ximboland, this is Mister Tib, your new Minister of Justice (it's just tibby in a beard, dont worry) these are the new and current forum rules, please read them as they will be enforced starting now. Policies ₊˚⊹ First and...
꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ forum rules and policies
Good morning Ximboland, this is Mister Tib, your new Minister of Justice (it's just tibby in a beard, dont worry) these are the new and current forum rules, please read them as they will be enforced starting now. Policies ₊˚⊹ First and...

Hot in Town Square

Reputation points helper thread
So we have helper topics on the forum for Badge collection. Fight Club and Quest for Curious Badge. Can I ask if you'll be so kind as to like this forum topic to help with Reputation points. My Idea is this everyone can just add something here and...
Change The Wor(l)d.
The game is simple! Just change/remove/add one letter of the word in the post above yours. Make sure it's a real word. If it's really a word that can't be changed anymore, just start a new word. :) Example: Person 1: Worm. Person 2: Word. Person 3:...
✧ Complementary Colours - Atheista’s Monthly Contest ✧
☆ hey fishies! ☆ we are now into august (and i can see us twisted in bedsheets, august slipped away), and that means new contest! so this months contest is… complementary colours. i hope this is a fun challenge, and as much as i love...
Us Americans have an obesity problem and were way to uncomfortable to talk about it
I recently went to a public event last month and while I was there, I noticed an overwhelming number of obese adults and, sadly enough, children. About 40% of Americans are obese. I know the early 2000s were harsh with their media and magazines...
lets be real here
we all get tired of playing all those forum games to get our post number up. so there's no need here. this thread is for saying whatever you want (within the rules ofc)! doesn't matter if it's on topic or completely random, just speak your mind!...

Ximboland stats

Population:
Prime Ximbo:
Treasury (USD): $0.00
Next Prime Ximbo election: 01.01.1970
Next State Minister elections: 01.01.1970
State in Charge:
Social media: | |
Best State Warriors this month:

nullplayer - 2592261 points
Legal Alien - lvl 44
mbbybbby - 555319 points
State Minister - lvl 270
CarCrashBimbo - 343302 points
Senator - lvl 57
Susan Slutzky - 275409 points
Senator - lvl 260
Eunyce - 272687 points
Fashion Manager - lvl 260
Sexiest this week:

AikiraSora - 24699 points
Senator - lvl 77
SinksTears - 19709 points
Citizen - lvl 163
Sandi Lut - 7584 points
State Minister - lvl 289
Mollie Mollie - 5062 points
Citizen - lvl 139
lillyfee - 4942 points
Citizen - lvl 182
Most reputable this week:

liza 5 - 821 points
Citizen - lvl 108
gum - 595 points
Senator - lvl 23
AikiraSora - 565 points
Senator - lvl 77
Yariman - 529 points
Senator - lvl 19
glamourGIRLLLLL - 496 points
Citizen - lvl 56
Best fighters this week:

Spiffyfunpants - 88 points
Senator - lvl 301
AikiraSora - 77 points
Senator - lvl 77
SilentlyScreaming - 63 points
Citizen - lvl 59
Slick_D - 45 points
Citizen - lvl 114
Eunyce - 37 points
Fashion Manager - lvl 260
Best debaters this week:

Kyele - 26 points
Citizen - lvl 196
califlower - 24 points
Fashion Designer - lvl 75
AltAcc - 18 points
Legal Alien - lvl 30
sachele - 17 points
Legal Alien - lvl 19
Hick Punk - 16 points
Citizen - lvl 36

Recently active

Senator

AikiraSora

Level 77
Sex Appeal 360882
Citizen

LaylaAster

Level 12
Sex Appeal 1166
Legal Alien

Celestris

Level 6
Sex Appeal 171
Citizen

nastya kviatkouski

Level 40
Sex Appeal 49394
Citizen

Teeny Bunny

Level 59
Sex Appeal 161887
Citizen

MissMAB

Level 67
Sex Appeal 238923

Democratically Elected Ximboland Leaders

(bravely leading the worlds only democratic social media platform)

Prime Ximbo

SweetasNuts

Level 32
Sex Appeal 24029
Minister of Justice

mister tib

Level 20
Sex Appeal 5756
Minister of Foreign Affairs

Slayyyocrates

Level 66
Sex Appeal 222940
Minister of Fashion

tibby

Level 307
Sex Appeal 41603817
Minister of Entertainment

Dean Winchester

Level 47
Sex Appeal 81227
State Minister

lovelifegirl

Level 256
Sex Appeal 15853809
State Minister

Sandi Lut

Level 289
Sex Appeal 29638643
State Minister

kimjongin

Level 251
Sex Appeal 14550674
Unlock

Level ?
Sex Appeal ???
Unlock

Level ?
Sex Appeal ???