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Players with ADHD

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Category
Haute Coffee Shop
Posts
247
Created
08.07.2020
Author
mayiaianthee
filibabie
filibabie
Level 46
Status: Citizen
Sex Appeal: 75841
Reputation: 23342
Posts: 828
Secville
filibabie
02.12.2022 16:29:13
filibabie
um hi i just got diagnosed w adhd and my doctor said it was important to find a community of other women w adhd so i can learn more abt others experiences and in that way feel less alienated so.....hey...... :p

02.12.2022 16:29:13
on wednesdays, thursdays, fridays, saturdays, sundays, mondays and tuesdays, we wear pink x <3
valentinesux
valentinesux
Level 52
Status: Citizen
Sex Appeal: 107757
Reputation: 36652
Posts: 543
Secville
valentinesux
02.12.2022 17:38:18
valentinesux
i have adhd and autism and i just got diagnosed recently w adhd, it can be rly hard to come to terms w certain things when ur diagnosed so late. lots of my symptoms were thought of as personality flaws rather than something i couldn't control (forgetfulness was misinterpreted as not caring, same w being distracted easily, hyperactivity or talking too much was me being "too much" or "too loud", was told to stop stimming because "you seem nervous"/"it's annoying")
it can be really hard to deal w stuff like that especially after being criticized ur whole life for things out of your control. idk your experience but i hope talking w other ppl w adhd can at least help u understand stuff abt urself that u never realized
i personally was bullied for my adhd and autistic behaviors so talking to other ppl who are neurodivergent has been rly helpful for me to feel less alienated. like i'm not the only one who deals w this stuff, and it's just that my brain is wired in a different way, but there are tons of other ppl who think in a lot of the same ways and there is nothing wrong with me for being this way
in case you or anyone else needs to hear it: you are not bad or broken. being neurodivergent can be really challenging but the issue is not with you, it's that many don't understand neurodivergence and are unwilling to accommodate it. you are trying your best and that's all you can do <3

02.12.2022 17:38:18
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filibabie
filibabie
Level 46
Status: Citizen
Sex Appeal: 75841
Reputation: 23342
Posts: 828
Secville
filibabie
02.12.2022 18:01:26
filibabie
ah tysm for this beautiful message!!! i know its not necessarily directly targeted at only me, but it rlly means a lot!!
for me personally, getting the diagnosis was a big relief, because it meant that there is a very valid reason for these qualities abt myself that i have struggled with!! it was like hey, i'm not just weird and bad at pulling myself together, it's my brain doing this!! so that was very nice :p i was bullied when i was a kid n a young teen for being different, i never rlly played or acted like the other kids/teens and i guess i was bad at masking, but luckily in my adult years, the people i surround myself with at work and uni are actually loving the way i am and are fully embracing me, which im sososo grateful for. obviously there's the odd 'youre so loud' or 'your laugh is obnoxious' or 'omg please SIT STILL' comment but i'm ok with them bc i know that ppl are ok with me<333 but it's still difficult when i meet ppl who are not embracing of that, my physio teacher from two semesters ago HATED my guts and i had no idea why, i just felt so wrong and little in her presence :// it's nice to know now at least, that it's her problem for not knowing how to deal w students who arent necessarily neurotypical and not mine for being a way i cannot help hehe :p so i think this diagnosis is just generally gonna be good for my confidence once i accept and find peace with the fact that i cant help the way i am and if someone doesnt like that then it literally cannot be my problem cause there's nothing i can do differently :')
ok sorry for the vent i think i needed this more than i might've thought i did hehe but this felt rlly nice and tysm again for sharing ur experience!!! <33

02.12.2022 18:01:26
on wednesdays, thursdays, fridays, saturdays, sundays, mondays and tuesdays, we wear pink x <3
valentinesux
valentinesux
Level 52
Status: Citizen
Sex Appeal: 107757
Reputation: 36652
Posts: 543
Secville
valentinesux
02.12.2022 18:07:32
valentinesux
no omg it's not too much i love hearing abt other ppls experiences!!! im a huge oversharer myself, that's also a symptom of adhd lollll
yeah it can be so hard to deal w people like that especially teachers :( the good thing is, once you're out of school stuff like that should improve. you might have bosses that are overbearing or overwork you but teachers have so much power over students and they can give u a lot of overwhelming work, i can't wait till im done w school tbh

02.12.2022 18:07:32
pixel graphics from Trilsys   my melody from wwwgirl
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 (xmas gift from the lovely @filibabie <3)

  (made by @Bimbl6 <3)





CinnamonSugar
CinnamonSugar
Level 160
Status: Citizen
Sex Appeal: 3269260
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Posts: 6783
Freethinkerland
CinnamonSugar
02.12.2022 23:32:18
CinnamonSugar
I am glad I finally got a diagnosis of ADHD (2+ yrs ago) but I am disappointed it took so long.

My mother (after the fact) admitted she had suspected it decades ago. But she had tried to get my older brother diagnosed as a child & he wasn't actually diagnosed, so she didn't even bother trying to get me diagnosed. 

I was misunderstood by teachers, school guidance counselors, professors, & even healthcare professionals...
My particular stimming behaviors tend to be body-focused repetitive behaviors. I don't think they always were. When I was really little, I sucked my thumb. I also had a silky scrap of fabric I liked to rub. But, my mother tried really hard to break me of those habits by the time I went to school... So I switched to skin picking, ripping off nails, & cheek/lip chewing.  I literally had a healthcare worker tell me he didn't believe me that I wasn't doing it with the intent to harm myself. I had multiple diagnoses from multiple providers.
Some said skin picking is a form of OCD. Some said it was self-harm related to depression. Many said they were anxious behaviors. One doctor claimed it was restlessness due to mania. 

I tried antidepressants, anxiolytics, mood stabilizers (for "mania"), even antipsychotics without success. 
I also had little to no success with therapy. 
Finally, a therapist said I probably wasn't making progress in therapy bc I had the wrong diagnosis. She suggested that I had ADHD. I talked to my psychiatrist about it. He said something along the lines of he has heard a lot of other people get misdiagnosed with depression & anxiety when they have ADHD or Autism because of the "executive dysfunction" that occurs. So, he diagnosed me with ADHD & I started stimulants which have made a difference.
We have discussed the possibility of me having autism, too, but he suggested I find someone who specializes in autism for that diagnosis.


02.12.2022 23:32:18
“If you know someone who’s depressed, please resolve never to ask them why. Depression isn’t a straightforward response to a bad situation; depression just is, like the weather.” ~Stephen Fry
Living with depression? Connect with others at the Mental Health Check-in.
valentinesux
valentinesux
Level 52
Status: Citizen
Sex Appeal: 107757
Reputation: 36652
Posts: 543
Secville
valentinesux
03.12.2022 02:10:35
valentinesux
wow, that sounds so hard to deal with im sorry u went through all that :( i was also dxed with anxiety and depression, and i don't think it was a misdiagnosis but they did overlook my adhd behaviors at the time, and ofc the depression meds didn't help my adhd symptoms so i was still struggling even after getting therapy and stuff
have you ever tried stim toys? i'm someone who also picks and chews a lot on my skin and it helps if i can replace that with something else. they have little chew toys too and those r some of my favs :)
it's definitely a good idea to find a specialist if ur looking to get tested for autism. personally, im 90+% sure that i have it but there are lots of downsides for a professional diagnosis...sometimes medical professionals will deny u procedures or informed consent if ur dxed with autism, it's ridiculous and scares the shit out of me tbh. i may want to get my tubes tied when i get older and apparently an autism dx is good enough reason for doctors to straight up tell you no. not to mention many jobs and schools will discriminate against you....it's really fucked up how openly nd ppl are discriminated against an it's just seen as okay. that being said, if you feel like it's the right choice for you, of course go ahead with it! i just personally have found more success implementing life skills for autistic ppl, kind of treating myself as if i do for sure have autism, because even if i am wrong no harm can come from me being more patient or careful w myself. and since autism and adhd have a lot of overlapping symptoms, lots of stuff works for both anyways, and there's no meds u can take for autistic symptoms unfortunately (if i could take meds for sensory overload i so would...)

03.12.2022 02:10:35
pixel graphics from Trilsys   my melody from wwwgirl
favicons from      
   

 (xmas gift from the lovely @filibabie <3)

  (made by @Bimbl6 <3)





CinnamonSugar
CinnamonSugar
Level 160
Status: Citizen
Sex Appeal: 3269260
Reputation: 324083
Posts: 6783
Freethinkerland
CinnamonSugar
03.12.2022 04:33:17
CinnamonSugar
Oh, yes, stim toys are great. I mostly use them around the house. I have a stim bracelet I sometimes wear while driving. (One hand on the wheel, one hand on the bracelet -- because otherwise that hand might be picking.) I can't wear bracelets to work bc I work in healthcare & it's considered unsanitary. 
I have 2 chew necklaces I haven't worn in a while. I was using them when I was unemployed. That's a good reminder, though. I can chew them when I'm off work. 

As far as the multiple diagnoses, it's hard to say for me personally if the depression & anxiety weren't just the result of untreated ADHD. My skin picking is not in a way I consider self-harm. I definitely don't identify with the manic diagnosis. I think the symptoms can overlap & that makes a diagnosis hard. 

I don't know if I will pursue an official autism diagnosis or not. I'm not sure if it will be beneficial. I think at best an official diagnosis could help if I wanted to apply for work accommodations or if I have trouble working & want to apply for disability services.
I hadn't considered any potential medical situations.  I know people can be deemed incompetent of making their own healthcare decisions, but doctors shouldn't assume everyone with autism is incompetent. 

03.12.2022 04:33:17
“If you know someone who’s depressed, please resolve never to ask them why. Depression isn’t a straightforward response to a bad situation; depression just is, like the weather.” ~Stephen Fry
Living with depression? Connect with others at the Mental Health Check-in.
valentinesux
valentinesux
Level 52
Status: Citizen
Sex Appeal: 107757
Reputation: 36652
Posts: 543
Secville
valentinesux
03.12.2022 04:57:16
valentinesux
yeah that's why it's so ridiculous, autism is considered by many to be something that makes you unable to make decisions for yourself. it's really dehumanizing :( about accommodations, i've heard that many of them aren't super helpful for people that aren't children (i'm thinking of school specifically, lots of them are like "extra time on tests" and such which isn't super helpful for a lot of people) but i'd recommend looking into your specific policies for your place of work. they should have them online or you should be able to ask someone about the specifics :p i did that for my school and it was really helpful to see what exactly they offered, and for me i realized the potential benefits were minimal in comparison to the time and effort it would take to explain my adhd to all of my professors lol

03.12.2022 04:57:16
pixel graphics from Trilsys   my melody from wwwgirl
favicons from      
   

 (xmas gift from the lovely @filibabie <3)

  (made by @Bimbl6 <3)





filibabie
filibabie
Level 46
Status: Citizen
Sex Appeal: 75841
Reputation: 23342
Posts: 828
Secville
filibabie
03.12.2022 18:50:43
filibabie
oh yea im big on oversharing hehe :p 
skin picking is a rlly big problem of mine, but im vain enough to do it where ppl wont notice – fingers, palms, bottom of feet, lips and then i sometimes bite lil flakes of the tip of my tongue. the finger thing especially sucks tho bc i work in healthcare as well where we use A LOT of hand sanitiser and it HURTS SO BAD when half my finger is picked to bits :(( anyway everyone always swatted my hands away when i started picking and i got rlly annoyed w it, they eventually stopped once i told them that ur not preventing me from picking my skin by doing that, ur just prolonging the process lmao, i'm literally unable to stop until i've picked the amount i decide is satisfying. didnt know it was an adhd thing!! i was told it was an ocd thing as well, but i dont have ocd in any sort of capacity so i wasnt really satisfied with this answer!!!

i've had periodic depressions since i was 15 n my psychiatrist was actually the one that suggested that undiagnosed adhd might be the underlying issue, so im excited to see if adhd treatment is gonna do something abt the depression as well – im currently on sertraline for the depression which is working well, but if treatment for adhd beats both issues then hey its a win-win!!

03.12.2022 18:50:43
on wednesdays, thursdays, fridays, saturdays, sundays, mondays and tuesdays, we wear pink x <3
valentinesux
valentinesux
Level 52
Status: Citizen
Sex Appeal: 107757
Reputation: 36652
Posts: 543
Secville
valentinesux
03.12.2022 19:12:49
valentinesux
i have the same issue w picking!!! tho i think mine is both ocd and adhd, part of it is definitely a compulsion for me, but i think with adhd it might be the same as like when ur unable to switch tasks, the picking is almost stimming and it's giving u dopamine so it's hard to stop. for me sometimes even tho i feel like i CANT stop if i break my focus i'll forget what i was doing and sometimes that helps me stop before it gets too bad

03.12.2022 19:12:49
pixel graphics from Trilsys   my melody from wwwgirl
favicons from      
   

 (xmas gift from the lovely @filibabie <3)

  (made by @Bimbl6 <3)





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