I'm still getting checked for some of the possible diagnosis but for now it's quite heavy depression, social anxiety, panic attacks, memory problems and some more lol
Mental Health check-in
Just found out my old abusive parents (I'm adopted now) just stole all of my inhertiance from my dead grandma that was for my college funds. Stole 23 thousand dollars and legally I can't do anything. I don't know if I'll be able to go to college now or be able to recover from this. It's hard moving on from abuse with roadbumps like this. : (
Barbs and Babes ~ <3
kinda just a mess and all over the place rn
Okay so Imma just trauma dump here.
I'm going to start out by saying, I am autistic, I haver BPD, CPTSD, OCD, and good ol chronic depression.
! months ago I lost my uncle, he died very abruptly, my mother had found him dead in his apartment because he wasn't answering his phone. I called my brother who I was no contact with (due to him not respecting my gender identity and my finance's sexuality) to go the apartment and make sure my mother was okay. I asked him not to call any other family members yet, due to them not being the best people...and he did and I'm dealing with so much guilt.
Within the hour my aunts were there, fighting over my uncles things. They beat up his girlfriend. They tried to beat up my mom. The cops were called. Everyone was barred from the house, my aunts broke in and stole important paperwork and many other things and blamed it on my mother and I. They ended up stealing 11,000 and blaming it on my mother. We were barred from the funeral. We couldn't take a portion of his ashes.
All because a part of me wanted to trust my brother to do the right thing...
I've spiraled out of control after keeping my BPD in check. I have turned off my emotions and become shell of who I've used to be. I can't connect to people anymore. I stopped writing and drawing, I just started my sex work up again because I need money, but I'm not having fun with it at all. The guilt that I feel is so much, my mother who I adore, couldn't say goodbye to her brother and its all my fucking fault. I don't want to bother my friends, my fiancé, anyone. I just lost my aunt a year prior, and just started feeling better. She died of a heart attack, and we weren't on talking terms (once again my gender identity) and a week before she died, I had this feeling to call her and tell her that I loved her, and I didn't. So the death of my uncle opened up those all wounds.
Also during this time I stopped talking to my father who was treating my like shit (long story but its because my dad found out my fiancé and I are poly and date other people separately). I reached out to him once my uncle died and asked for support and all he said was "good luck" and wouldn't pick up my calls. I don't have any other family but my mom and my youngest brother. I don't know what to do. I am finding it so hard to pull myself out of this rut. I am so afraid to just talk to people about it because I am the strong friend. I don't cry. I don't get upset...I just find it so hard to be vulnerable.
If you read this much, thank you, if not. I'm happy to just scream into the void. tbh this feels better to just get this all off my chest.
I'm going to start out by saying, I am autistic, I haver BPD, CPTSD, OCD, and good ol chronic depression.
! months ago I lost my uncle, he died very abruptly, my mother had found him dead in his apartment because he wasn't answering his phone. I called my brother who I was no contact with (due to him not respecting my gender identity and my finance's sexuality) to go the apartment and make sure my mother was okay. I asked him not to call any other family members yet, due to them not being the best people...and he did and I'm dealing with so much guilt.
Within the hour my aunts were there, fighting over my uncles things. They beat up his girlfriend. They tried to beat up my mom. The cops were called. Everyone was barred from the house, my aunts broke in and stole important paperwork and many other things and blamed it on my mother and I. They ended up stealing 11,000 and blaming it on my mother. We were barred from the funeral. We couldn't take a portion of his ashes.
All because a part of me wanted to trust my brother to do the right thing...
I've spiraled out of control after keeping my BPD in check. I have turned off my emotions and become shell of who I've used to be. I can't connect to people anymore. I stopped writing and drawing, I just started my sex work up again because I need money, but I'm not having fun with it at all. The guilt that I feel is so much, my mother who I adore, couldn't say goodbye to her brother and its all my fucking fault. I don't want to bother my friends, my fiancé, anyone. I just lost my aunt a year prior, and just started feeling better. She died of a heart attack, and we weren't on talking terms (once again my gender identity) and a week before she died, I had this feeling to call her and tell her that I loved her, and I didn't. So the death of my uncle opened up those all wounds.
Also during this time I stopped talking to my father who was treating my like shit (long story but its because my dad found out my fiancé and I are poly and date other people separately). I reached out to him once my uncle died and asked for support and all he said was "good luck" and wouldn't pick up my calls. I don't have any other family but my mom and my youngest brother. I don't know what to do. I am finding it so hard to pull myself out of this rut. I am so afraid to just talk to people about it because I am the strong friend. I don't cry. I don't get upset...I just find it so hard to be vulnerable.
If you read this much, thank you, if not. I'm happy to just scream into the void. tbh this feels better to just get this all off my chest.
I'm currently diagnosed with severe depression, anxiety along with anxiety tics, and PTSD. But I may also be getting diagnosed with ADHD soon.
I'm not diagnosed with anything that I know of but I've been in and out of therapy since I was 6 (little me kept trying to kill herself, but I don't remember)
Honestly not doing very well. Switching anxiety meds so i'm very on edge.
Make his pockets hurt!
We may be platonic, but this ass is iconic <3
We may be platonic, but this ass is iconic <3
I have severe Anxiety and i've been depressed since i was like 10 years old. I've also struggled with diffrent eating disorders my whole life
Purr
I have been diagnosed both with depression and BPD in my two psych ward visits but so far I feel calm and not unhappy... let's see how that goes
awh im sorry to see so many of your in tough places, i really hope things start to look up soon!
they're under your skinXimboland stats
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Citizen - lvl 182
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Senator - lvl 77
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Citizen - lvl 114
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Fashion Manager - lvl 260
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Fashion Designer - lvl 75
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Citizen - lvl 196
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Citizen - lvl 36
Layla Zenin
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Citizen - lvl 210
